Interview with Paul Anderson
If you met Paul Anderson on the street, unless he is wearing shorts, he looks and acts just like everybody else. He is a prize winning photographer, husband and father (grandfather!). He also happens to be a double leg amputee. I didn’t know this when I let him know I used his self-portrait in an earlier article (Wheelchair Etiquette 101) but once I did find out, I had to ask him a few questions.I am happy to report that I had the pleasure of interviewing Paul over the weekend to push to the forefront that only because you have a disability, it doesn’t mean life is over.
You have some great looking photography, your passion is obvious, how did you get into this business? Dealing with models (nude ones at that), you’re a lucky man!
Before I lost my right leg in April of 2001 I use to go the the mountains to photograph nature type photos: landscapes and waterfalls. When I tried to go out again to some of the trails I found I couldn’t because of the terrain and the length of walk. At the time I couldn’t walk more than a tenth or two without getting tired. I didn’t want to give up photography because I love it too much.
I found a photographer in Burlington, VT. who was forming group shots for new models to expose them to the modeling world. All women who were interested would go to these shoots where there were 6-7 photographers and almost as many models. I’ve always wanted to photograph women and I felt I could still do my photography only on level ground.
After I started building up my own portfolio I wanted to try photographing nudes. I search the photo sites until I found a model that was an art model. She would pose for art drawing classes. That was 5 years ago and still photographing women and some men, both dressed and nude.
What other activities do you participate in other then photography?
Woodworking would be my second love. I’ve built some furniture for the house like a corner cupboard, linen closet and another cabinet for my wife’s friend and her husband. I have a garage here at the house where I have some basic power tools. Table saw, router, skill saw, drills, cut-off saw and various other tools.
My wife and I bought this house were in just over two years ago now and for the first five months we re-did the inside by redoing the kitchen, bath and flooring. The walls had a dark paneling all around and made it look too dark in here so down it came. Sometimes I would remove my legs just so I could work down close to the floor. The kitchen was red at the time and not functional. Here is a picture of before/after.
How and when did your disability occur? Did you suffer from ghost limbs - meaning you still feel your legs even if they aren’t there anymore?
I would say the start of my disability started back in 1994 when I worked for a company in Maine. I had to wear steel-toe shoes for work. I was a textile machine mechanic and supervisor. My first day wearing them I got a blister on the side of my big toe. I am diabetic and had neuropathy as well. The hospital doctor cut the toe open and cleaned out what he could and it healed nicely. The doctor told me it might come back and haunt me and it did on Dec. 24, 2000 when I kicked some ice build-up from behind my car tire. Three days later my big toe and second toe started turning black. By time the doctors operated trying to find good tissue half my foot was gone. I heard one doctor say that the infection had been in my foot for some time. Guess it just sat there dormant waiting to be disturbed.
As for ghost pains I still get them. My foot will itch or my toes feel like they’re being pinched. I can sit and wiggle my toes only there’s no toes there but the muscles in the leg still move like I am and I can feel them moving is what’s a trip. I lost my right leg in April of 2001 and the left one in April of 2004, both due to infections.
How much of an impact did loosing both of your legs have on your life? Can you describe your initial emotional state and how you have dealt with this new reality in your life?
My first reaction is that I knew I was going to lose a leg, my right one that is, and I was more concerned about my wife than I was myself. I kept an open mind as to what I was going to go through and took one day and one step at a time. I use to get very frustrated that I couldn’t go places or do some of the things I wanted to like get out in the hills and photograph waterfalls. Some areas are quite a hike to get to. My wife would see that I was frustrated and try to comfort me but she said I would close her out of my life during that period. I don’t remember doing that but I do remember being very frustrated. I just wanted to get up and walk again and I wasn’t patient enough to go through the steps. I kept feeling like I was being babied every step of the way. After learning to walk with a prosthetic leg I wanted to learn stair and they were still trying to have me walk. I was walking I wanted to go up stairs. So I felt like I was being held back and treated like poor you, I feel sorry for your loss.
I’m no different until you look down and see my legs and I try to treat it as I’m no different. I know my limitations and I push them once in a while.
I have seen some people able to walk upright even with two prosthetic legs, have you been able to achieve this or are you still training yourself to re-discover your balance?
It took me a while to find my balance but have done pretty good over the past two years. To all that wonder I can only describe it as walking on stilts all day never getting off of them. Try it and you’ll get an idea. After being on them for a while you learn where your balance is. Then step on a pebble and see what happens. You lose your balance very quickly.
I go out in the woods now still carrying my camera and a walking stick in the other hand for rough terrain. I don’t climb rocks yet and may never try that but I’m getting out farther into the woods.
What is the general reaction when you meet new people (especially in your business) when they discover that you are disabled? How do you break the ice so they see YOU and not only your disability?
When I arrange a photo shoot with a model I normally don’t mention that I wear two prosthetic legs. I don’t cover them up either when I go on a shoot. I wear shorts just about year round. Some try to act like nothings wrong until they can’t take it no longer and ask what happen to me. I act like there’s nothing wrong with me. I get out of my car and walk towards them to greet them or stop and grab my camera out of the car.
How do you feel about strangers (especially kids), asking you questions about your disability? How do you feel when the parents tell them to keep quiet and not stare?
I love it when people ask especially the kids. I had one of my legs decorated with a motorcycle on the socket. My prosthetic guy wrapped a cloth of a motorcycle around the socket before placing the hardener on it for protection. The kids would see the bike then ask questions. The parents on the other hand were the problem. They would say don’t bother the man or grab the kids hand and drag them off. I would quickly tell the parents that I don’t mind them asking and that I welcomed the question no matter how many times I heard them. Ask people you will get a good response by most.
Have you found some distinct advantages or liberties that your disability gives you in daily life over us abled people?
You mean like parking? I hated the first time I parked in a handicap area. Some times it works out fine when I have a full parking lot and I can park close to the store. Sometimes someone who is not handicapped will park in those spots just to run into the store for something quick. I went to a car dealership and tried to park in the one they had close to the service area but it was taken. I go inside and this woman didn’t look to see I walked in and she told the mechanic she was in the idiot spot out front. Then I spoke up and told her that’s why I could park there. I made her fell really really small and I was glad I did. I have no legs I’m not an idiot and neither is anyone else who’s handicapped. She was correct in saying she was in the idiot’s spot because she parked there which made her the idiot.
Wheelchairs, what are your sentiments about them? I have heard some people describe them as the tool of Satan while other are rather happy using them. What about you?
I’m using mine right now typing this letter. It comes in handy at my computer. I can roll back and get up. No seriously, it came in handy a lot of times. Would I spend the rest of my life in one…no. I wanted to get up and walk again and couldn’t wait to get out of it. The hard part was at doors especially the non-power doors that I had to grab pull back and quickly try an maneuver into all while sitting in the chair. And the doors with ramps in front of the door were even harder. So there were pros and cons with using one.
What are the things you miss most about having legs?
Basketball. I don’t jump very well with these legs. And climbing rocks. Use to be driving then I got hand controls for the car. I couldn’t feel the pedals so giving and letting off on the gas was trial and error.
Do you have any kids or gf/wife? How have they been affected by your Disability?
I celebrate my 27th wedding anniversary this August and I have two grown boys and two granddaughters. My youngest son, at the time I was going through all of this, took it the hardest. He was always worried of losing me. His school work was effected and his life in general. I tried to show him I was okay and getting around well but if I coughed he worried. I guess I put my wife through some tough times when I got frustrated over not learning to walking fast enough. I have a lot of patience but guess I didn’t have much back then. Now everything is so normal now. They still worry when I stumble but I try to do it with grace.
How do you keep up to date with advancing technologies in prosthetics? Does the government help you with your medical bills and making sure you have everything you need to continue living a productive Life?
My loss of legs were due to a work related injury because they made it mandatory to wear the shoes without proper fittings. So I collect worker’s comp and medicare on both legs. The worker’s comp is fighting the left leg so medicare pays for that one right now. I had my case in court and won but due to the wording, the insurance company is arguing. I’ve been trying to get some water legs so I can go swimming. I’ve been trying for a few years now and they keep ignoring me. Trying again this year and added a walk-in tub. It’s not too safe how I get in and out now.
Are you a member of a support group or do you attend meetings / conventions with other people in the same predicament?
I live in a very rural area and have never seen any support group advertised or my prosthetic guy has never mentioned any either. He works with several hospitals in the area. I do have some online friends that are like me and I try and give as much good advice as I can. One gentleman from Vietnam who had a car accident and lost both legs. His feeling is he doesn’t want to live and after talking with him he like the way I think but I don’t know if I’m helping him.
How has your disability affected your love life?
Without going into too much detail I can say it started off kind of comical. You feet keep you from falling backwards, did you know that? Well when you feel like making love your mind pretty much empties of all those things you should remember and you fall backwards. Now we are more inventive as to our lovemaking and that’s all I’ll say. So it hasn’t effected it too much.
How do you wish people reacted when they see you? What annoys the hell out of you or drives you nuts?
The parents of the kids that want to ask or even the parents that want to ask. They either drag their kids away like I have an illness or they stare and act like I’m a monster of some kind. I try to break the ice and say something but they look at me and walk away. I want people to get over the perfect world they think they live in an open their eyes. This could happen to them just as easy as it happened to me.
If you wish to view some of photography Paul has accumulated both before and after his disability, please visit the following sites:
http://home.together.net/~anderfam/thecameraseye/
http://www.onetalentsource.com/portfolio/1630/
The Bottom Line
Disabilities are simply a new challenge in life, not the end of it.
